Tarzan Chimp 'Cheetah' Dead at 80
December 28, 2012
Retired film ape Cheetah, 80, died of kidney failure at the Suncoast Primate Sanctuary in Palm Harbor, Florida last week.
Cheetah starred in Tarzan the Ape Man from 1932 and Tarzan and His Mate two years later, alongside Johnny Weissmuller.
He loved to laugh.
In his retirement years, Cheetah loved finger-painting, watching football, and enjoyed Christian music.
Like many retired movie stars, Cheetah knew how to rest, relax, and throw around the old crappola.
Music Associations: The Monkees - Monkees Theme & The Beatles - I Am The Walrus "I am the ape man"
Ambrosia
December 27, 2011
Ambrosia is the food of the gods. In the southern United States, ambrosia is a mix of orange and coconut. That's what they say.
I've had orange and coconut -- and I just had some again -- and I don't like it.
My world is simple. I don't like mixers... not electric... not DJ
(necessarily)... and not recipes that take perfectly good foods and mix
them together into crappola.
Some people say, "Why not mix foods, it all ends up
at the same place?" to which any sane person could question eating
anything with any flavor at all. Why not eat crappola?
Speaking of crappola, I recently saw a recipe for Santa Hat Brownies, with brownies, frosting, and strawberries.
Occasionally I ask questions that I know the answers. Maybe it's the optimist in me expecting things to get better.
Santa Hat Brownies are a perfectly good way to wreck perfectly good foods.
Music Association: Ambrosia - Biggest Part Of Me
The Gift That Keeps Giving
December 24, 2011
This year I decided to get everyone on my list the Anti-Clutter Kit.
The Anti-Clutter Kit comes with the Anti-Clutter book and dvd, and
includes the organizational shelf, labels, garage sale signs, tags,
Tshirts, sectional sorter, date stamper, and promotional literature.
Merry Christmas.
Music Association: Allan Sherman - The Twelve Gifts Of Christmas
Lights
December 23, 2011
LED lights are so cool, really. They also use less energy and last longer.
I just dropped off an old strand of Christmas lights at an Ace Hardware.
Progress has never felt so progressive.
Music Association: Lights - Savior
Understanding Learning Algorithms
All I Want For Christmas Is You
December 20, 2011
The hottest songs on Billboard's Hot 100 are:
1. We Found Love by Rihanna
2. Sexy And I Know It by LMFAO
3. It Will Rain by Bruno Mars
Researchers say that they can predict the top hits through the use of an algorithm (read: computer).
Know how? It cheats.
Computers That Cheat
A long time ago, I studied predictive behavior to try to understand it.
As an offshoot, I studied artificial intelligence programs. Now --
forget everything you learned in movies and on TV -- artificial
intelligence programs are algorithms that learn by making mistakes.
They learn by being wrong, and then they look at the answers.
Programming
Computer programming is never a linear process. It is always trial and
error, and the easy stuff has already been programmed. There are two
paths to complex programming:
◊ feeding junk food and coffee to a team of programmers each taking a piece of a large puzzle or
◊ having the algorithm learn by looking at the answers
AutoDrive
In my novel about creating the self-driving car, a team of programmers
each take a piece of a puzzle and a manager stitches the pieces
together. Relying on programmer teamwork, that's how I would do it. That's not how Google would do it.
Google-Drive
Google is chauffeuring their self-driving car around. Consider it the
world's longest driving instruction because the car isn't exactly
driving itself. It's learning and re-learning. It makes mistakes.
Google boasts that it hasn't gotten into an accident yet, but that is the reason for the driving instructor, isn't it?
※
Google cars need a sensor in the ground to park the car (like a train needing a track)
※
Google cars have been driven around by two people (one works with Google-Drive, one watches the road)
※
Google cars have been driven in California and Nevada 160,000 miles with human intervention and 1,000 miles without human intervention
※
Google uses the Toyota Pruis and Audi TT as its models
A Hit
Drivers don't want hits; musicians do. The University of Bristol's Intelligent Systems Laboratory
wants people to believe that its algorithm can predict top songs, just
like Google wants you to believe that it has a self-driving car. But if
you look at its hits and misses, it has a lot to learn.
Listening to a local Christmas compilation CD, the one song I really liked was All I Want For Christmas Is You by Redpath, a local duo from Minneapolis.
I don't think the University of Bristol would've figured that.
Music Associations: The Beatles - Drive My Car & Redpath - All I Want For Christmas Is You
The Spirit of Christmas
December 16, 2011
My body is on loan from the Smithsonian.
Was that the Air and Space or was it the one with the Prehysteric Animals?
Religion is for Sundays for some people, for Saturdays for others, and
for Fridays for still others. They probably couldn't see
why Christmas shopping stampedes would be listed in the Book
of Irony. For me religion is everyday, like music or humor. For
example, I clean up after myself -- religiously. I pray and sing --
religiously. And I take care of my body as if it were on loan from the
Smithsonian.
As If
So you're a loaner?
No, wait... what? That's something else that is never mentioned in
Commercialized Christmas -- Christmas is a time of loneliness... of
missing people long gone... of feeling alone even in a crowd because
while you appreciate the people that are there, you miss those who are
absent. You laugh with friends and feel a twinge of guilt that everyone
isn't part of the moment.
Hope
I'd like to think that Christmas is a time of renewed hope for a better
tomorrow, peace on Earth, and happiness. That's not just wishful
thinking. That's where I put my efforts, year around. But then
I'm youthful and optimistic. That's me in the jeans.
Music Association: Brenda Lee - Rockin' Around the Christmas Tree
The Best Christmas Music
December 15, 2011
Here in the Twin Cities we have a few radio stations that play Christmas music for the entire season.
Add all the stores that play piped in Christmas music, and you have a
boat-load of Christmas. It's quantity burying quality.
We're all in the same boat... being deluged by overkill.
The best Christmas music is buffered with other music, or silence, to keep the Christmas music nerve from going nuts.
Christmas music needs a pause. At concerts, there are pauses. Choirs pause. Even Christmas cats have paws.
My favorite Christmas music is a mix between pop exaggerations of
contemporary standards and classical choir hymns. It's not important
which songs. Any Christmas music can drive people crazy after a month
of Christmas music bombardment.
That's generally how to have the best Christmas music.
More specifically, songs about Grandma's traffic accident or dental incompleteness should be avoided.
"Here's that memo, Glo o o o o o o ria."
Music Association: Silent Night
He Sees You When You're Sleeping...
December 14, 2011
He doesn't see you when you're awake; he just assumes you're awake, because if he saw you when you're awake, presumably you could see him too, and you'd ask him why he's staring.
He can't believe his eyes. You call those dreams?
Music Association: Bruce Springsteen, et al. - Santa Claus Is Coming To Town
Don't Bother Knockin'
When The Horse Is A Rockin'
December 13, 2011
Last night I dreamt I was on a rocking horse. The woman riding the
rocking horse next to me was talking about themed Christmas parties,
where all the presents and treats fit the theme.
My horse bucked a bit when I asked, "What was it this year?"
"Bacon."
We rode up the rocking horse trail. I told her about seeing bacon candy canes at Urban Outfitters, but I wasn't able to see paying $8 when bacon and candy canes are two things I don't eat. [Patina sells them for $4.50.]
She said they tried to get Kevin Bacon for the party, but he wasn't available.
I said he was probably close... six steps away. She rode off.
Music Association: Hues Corporation - Rock The Boat
December 9, 2011
Cats enjoy Coca-Cola for alertness and enjoy the bubbles
of other Coke products. It's nothing to hiss at.
Also, the number
of journalists imprisoned worldwide is 179.
That ought to
teach 'em not to dangle participles in front of authorities.
Okay, so back on the can of Coke.
Imagine putting it in an electric can-opener. It would be like a
rotating sprinkler. You'd tear apart your entire kitchen and still find sticky Coke spots on things years later.
Music Association: Stray Cats -
Stray Cat Strut
Toy In Iran
Top Ten Reasons Iran Has The RQ-170
December 8, 2011
Iran said they captured a downed unmanned flying wing, but they didn't.
Now they say they did, and they did.
Top Ten reasons
Iran has the RQ-170 Sentinel
10.
This time they said Please
9. Unmanned drink cart
spilled coffee on unmanned passenger
8.
Justification
for new attack drones that shoot down enemy RQ-170s
7. Self-destruct
delayed due to daylight savings time foul up
6.
Google street-view vans blocked at Iran border
5. Expensive
gift-wrapping of new CIA computer virus
4. Jammer
(Avtobaza flavored)
3. Lockheed
Martin's Black Friday sale had a strict returns policy (someone threw
away the box)
2. Parts
of eastern Iran look just like Nevada <home!>
1. Secret
Santa
Music Association: Steve Miller
- Fly Like An Eagle
70 Years of Infamy
December 7, 2011
Imperial Japan attacked the US Naval Fleet at Pearl Harbor on the
morning of December 7, 1941, sinking 4 battleships, damaging the other
4 battleships and 10 other ships, and killing 2,402 Americans.
Imperial
Japanese Mistakes
The Japanese plan considered hitting the 16 above-ground
fuel storage tanks, but only as part of a third
wave
of planes which never occurred; the loss of the fuel reserves would
have significantly delayed US actions in the Pacific. The Japanese
missed the 3 US aircraft carriers, which were out of Pearl on
maneuvers. And the Japanese miscalculated that the US would defend
British Burma if attacked by the Japanese.
United
States Mistakes
On February 1, 1933 the US Navy staged a mock attack on
the base
at Pearl Harbor; the attack succeeded, and the US defense of the
base failed. In 1940, the Japanese attacked
French
Indochina (Vietnam), and in reaction, President Roosevelt moved the US
Pacific Naval Headquarters from San Diego to Pearl Harbor in the US
Territory of Hawaii. At the same time, Roosevelt ordered a
military buildup in the Philippines. After the Pearl Harbor attack, the
US imprisoned 110,000
Japanese-Americans in War Relocation Camps for the duration
of WWII.
Music Association: Edwin Starr -
War (Huh)
Snowflakes, Fingerprints, and DNA Are Unique*
* Except when they're the same
December 6, 2011
It's been snowing glitter in central Minnesota -- light, picturesque,
fluffy-like-Gabriel-Iglesias snowflakes that
don't add up to much by way of accumulation.
No two snowflakes
are alike, except when they are.
And while catching up on my math-blog reading, I learned from John
McGowan that fingerprints
are not unique either. Sure, most
fingerprints, snowflakes, and DNA are unique, but that's as absolute as
it gets.
DNA is unique, except for monozygotic twins.
"Are you
identical or fraternal twins?"
"We're monozygotic twins."
As a kid, the most absolute rule I learned was:
every
rule has an exception
-- except for that one, which, due to that exception, means that even that
rule has an exception, which negates the exception, which brings back
the exception...
I just got swept up in illogic. Sweeping generalizations are a fallacy
of logic.
Except when they aren't.
Music Associations: Paramore -
The Only Exception, Katy Perry - Fingerprints, & Supertramp -
Logical
Peace on Earth
December 5, 2011
Some artists work with paints, others clay, John Quigley
works with people on people issues. He recently copied Picasso's Dove
of Peace in Palestine, near Jericho.
In 2006, Banksy
painted a West Bank wall with a silhouette of a kid floating
with balloons and other
graffiti. [In that last
link, I like the old Palestinian man telling Banksy that he
made the wall look beautiful. Banksy thanked him, only to be told, "We don't want it to be
beautiful. Go home."]
If you're keeping score, that's two British artists calling attention
to the West
Bank wall and the Palestinian-Israeli conflict.
Where are other artists?
Palestinian artist Majd
Abdel Hamid painted the Palestinian Declaration of
Independence on the West Bank wall.
Others lend their name, without paint, to boycotting West Bank
settlements, like the Jewish
Voice For Peace, which lists its supporters.
I'd like to see more.
There should be a documentary about life in Qalqilya,
the most heavily walled West Bank city.
That's not a wall. That's a city-sized prison.
Anywhere else in the world, even Antarctica,
has more YouTube videos. Antarctica would be more inviting and a more
hospitable place to live.
There should be more than just this.
The PBS documentary series Frontline
was there in 2003, when the wall was started. It's about time they go
back.
Music Association: Pink Floyd -
Another Brick in the Wall
Peace of Mind
December 2, 2011
Here is a universal
letter from Albert Einstein in 1950:
A
human being is a part of the whole, called by us "Universe," a part
limited in time and space. He experiences himself, his thoughts and
feelings as something separated from the rest — a kind of
optical
delusion of his consciousness. The striving to free oneself from this
delusion is the one issue of true religion. Not to nourish the delusion
but to try to overcome it is the way to reach the attainable measure of
peace of mind.
With
my best wishes,
sincerely
yours,
Albert
Einstein
I corrected one
punctuation error and thought
about gender-neutralizing his statement, but then thought, who am I to
correct Einstein?
Music Association: The Beatles -
Across the Universe
Arsenic and Old Lead
December 1, 2011
Apple juice and grape juice aren't good for you if they have high
arsenic and lead content due to soil contamination.
Consumer
Reports magazine conducted a survey of 88 apple and grape
juices.
Ten percent of those
samples had
total arsenic levels exceeding federal drinking-water standards of 10
parts per billion (ppb) and 25 percent had lead levels higher than the
5 ppb limit for bottled water set by the FDA. Most of the arsenic
detected in our tests was the type called inorganic, which is a human
carcinogen.
Their findings are being reported in the January 2012 issue of Consumer
Reports magazine. Here's a sample
report.
Consumer Reports also commissioned a study of inorganic arsenic in
juice drinkers and non-juice drinkers. They found higher inorganic
arsenic in juice drinkers. They also provide a USGS
map of the United States showing groundwater arsenic.
Music Association: The Osmonds -
One Bad Apple
